Anyone who says that Barack Hussein Obama’s middle name is the same as Saddam’s last name, is enormously misinformed. This isn’t a “oh you can’t go there” issue, this is a “you are demonstrably wrong and I can prove that is not true” issue.

In Arabic nomenclature “Hussein” would not ever actually refer to Saddam Hussein Adb Al-Majid Al-Tikriti. The way Arabic names work is you are given your first name (i.e. Saddam), then the second name is your father’s given name (Hussein), the third name is your paternal grandfather’s given name (Abd, which if you’re clever, you’ll notice should also be the father’s second name), the fourth name is Al-family name (i.e. Al-Majid, meaning ‘of the Majid family’), and the fifth/last name is Al-location of birth (i.e. Al-Tikriti, meaning ‘from the Tikriti district’).

So for example, John McCain’s name in Arabic Nomenclature would be “John John John Al-McCain Al-Panama.” And apparently everyone in the country would call him “John John”… does everyone see why that’s stupid or do I need to keep going?

Referring to Saddam as “Hussein” makes about as much sense as referring to Samuel Wurzelbacher as “Joe”… oh wait …

Here we go, referring to him as “Saddam Hussein” is like calling our current President “George W.”…goddammit!

One more try: it’d be like if you referred to Reagan as “Ronald Wilson” it sounds like a name but it’s not the way to identify who you’re talking about. Yeah. Third time was the charm.

Now in accordance with Godwin’s Law, I will make the obligatory reference to Hitler. Unfortunately, Adolf Hitler and Joseph Stalin had NO middle names. So if you don’t have a middle name, congratulations, your parents might have named you after Hitler. Enjoy those red arm bands and those nice Jewish children who will be beating you up at the flagpole after school.

I guess it’d be like criticizing someone with the middle name of Harvey (Lee _ Oswald), or Willis (Charles _ Manson), or Wilkes (James _ Booth). Although I think if you name your kid Anything Wilkes Anything you’re just asking for someone to kick him in the crotch. Repeatedly.